School Refusal
Most kids like to go to school; if nothing else, they enjoy seeing their friends. Some kids get themselves so worked up at the thought of going to school they manifest symptoms of anxiety. A few children may simply be manipulative; others may be fearful of a specific situation (they hate their Math teacher or [...]
Children and Divorce
Paul Amato is a researcher at Penn State University. Dr. Amato recently co-authored a study titled the National Longitudinal Study of Marriage. Amato and his co-researcher Dr. Alan Booth wanted to look at – among other things – the effects of divorce on children. “We discovered that kids from certain kinds of marriages didn’t suffer [...]
Families and Technology
A new study from the Pew Internet and American Life Project looks at how families are using the internet and cell phones to stay connected: The internet and cell phones have become central components of modern family life. Among all household types, the traditional nuclear family has the highest rate of technology usage and ownership. [...]
Divorce and ADHD
From Reuters: Divorce rates higher when child has ADHD. Parents of children with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) may be more likely than other parents to divorce before their child’s 8th birthday, a new study suggests. The study included nearly 500 couples – 286 had a child with ADHD and 206 had a child without this [...]
The Importance of Date Nights
Yesterday, I wrote that many of the couples I talk with look back fondly on the early days of their marriage. I think it’s the cohesion and teamwork – the “us against the world mentality” – that created a sense of positiveness in the marriage. I just can’t see youth and poverty as being beneficial [...]
Parenting and Marriage
One of the questions I ask every couple who sees me for marriage counseling is “When was the relationship at its best?” Often, the answer is when they were first starting out. They were young, poor, and had small children at home. The interesting thing about this nearly universal answer is that youth, poverty, and [...]
ADHD: Overdiagnosed?
A question came up in class the other day: do I believe ADHD is over-diagnosed? Students ask this question every semester. Parents ask me the same question in my counseling office on a regular basis. I’ve always had a problem with the term over-diagnosed. I keep thinking of a retailer who has over-stocked a particular [...]
Helicopter Parents Reconsidered
This time last year I said some unkind things about “helicopter parents”. Helicopter parents is a term that describes parents who “hover” over their children. More than hovering, it carries a connotation of parents who do their child’s homeword, fight their battles, and generally handicap their child by not allowing to succeed or fail on [...]
Parents Who Hover
My secretary fielded a phone call the other day: a mom wanted to make an appointment for her 19-year-old son AND she wanted to come in – by herself – for the first session BEFORE I saw the young man. I overheard her explain that “I don’t have to ask him; I already know that [...]
Fathers & Sons
“When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.” -Mark Twain
