I’ve been thinking about conflicted congregations lately. For the past seven years I’ve served three churches as an Intentional Interim pastor and one church as a Transitional pastor. Each with only a few weeks off in between. Two of the four churches had just experienced a church split, one was on the verge of splitting, one church was simply dying (literally, the average age had to be at least 85). Looking forward to a break from high conflict congregations (if nothing else to convince people at my home church that my wife is NOT a single mother) I was asked to consider helping another church that was experiencing difficulties. I told Sherri I thought we should pray about it. She quickly replied, “God says ‘no’ “. Who knew the Lord was a petite blonde?
A few weeks later, my pastor called on a Friday night and asked if I could preach on Sunday. “It’s been quite a week… I’m just not ready for Sunday. And, I’ve got a really important meeting Sunday afternoon.” I spoke on one of my favorite topics: Being the Body. I addressed one of the themes Tod at It Takes a Church has been writing about: how the church belongs to all of us, not just the pastor. I was questioned closely by the pastor in between services about who I had been talking to and what I knew. No one and nothing. The next day, one of our key associate pastors resigned.
Last week we had a BIG meeting at church to ‘discuss’ the youth ministry. Emotions and tensions were high; words were shouted; tears were shed. When I told a friend yesterday I would be preaching again this coming Sunday, he asked, “Who’s leaving now?”.
It’s not my fault, really.
I arrived on the scene long after conflict had begun. Conflict starts at the beginning. Not just the first day a new minister arrives on the field, but from the beginning of the search. In some cases conflict goes back to the birth of the congregation.
Two key ingredients to avoiding conflict are: 1) understand that leading a church is an interaction of the pastor’s role and the role of the church body. Both roles need to be clearly defined and understood. Tod is doing a good job of addressing this topic.
Secondly, and equally importantly, the congregation must have a sense of identity. I’m using the term identity as synonymous with vision or purpose. Which ever term you prefer it should answer the question, “Why another church? What makes us different from any other church in town?”.
More than just a mission statement, a vision of the church gives the congregation a reason for being. I asked one pastor what his vision for his church was and he rattled off a Warrenesqe summary of the “five purposes”. No. If Rick Warren is correct (I realize not everyone thinks he is, but bear with me for a moment) then the ‘five purposes’ are the basic structure ALL congregations should have. It is not a unique identity. If we can’t think of an answer for such a basic question, then we need to close the doors, sell the property, and attend another church that has a definite sense of why they are here.
To say that our identity is to fulfill the ‘five purposes’ of a church would be like me saying the vision for my life is to breathe in… followed by breathing out. And then I’m going to do that again. It’s necessary, but hardly an inspiring plan for my day.
Conflict begins when a congregation has no idea of who they are. Their basic theology may be correct – they know whose they are – but they have no clear idea of why God has called these members of the body together at this particular time. So any pastor who meets some basic requirements and is willing to come will do.
The problem is, while most can’t articulate what the vision of the church is, they have very definite ideas about what it is not. The pastor is, in effect, set up for failure.
I think a congregation’s vision emerges as each individual is able to articulate what God is doing in his or her life. As I share with others what I believe my gifts are and what my place in the body is, I discover others whose gifts complement mine. Slowly, like the piecing together of a jigsaw puzzle, a picture begins to emerge.
The puzzle picture isn’t complete without a pastor. And not any pastor will do. Somewhere there is a puzzle piece that fits.
Conflict starts at the beginning of the search if a congregation erroneously believes all puzzle pieces are interchangeable.
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